Are You a Child Caring for a Parent?

Senior Care East Hampton

One out of every six Americans cares for an older adult, and 89% of those older adults are a relative. Just over half of those family caregivers care for a parent. Are you one of them? It’s not the easiest role to hold.

Your mom is diagnosed with dementia, which is one of the leading reasons adult children care for a parent. As your mom’s health shifts, there are things you need to remember.

She Should Prepare Herself Legally

Has your mom seen a lawyer to set up legal protections, like an advance directive and medical and financial powers of attorney? She needs to as soon as possible.

Powers of attorney, especially medical POAs, are important for a family caregiver. If anything happens to your mom and she can’t make medical decisions on her own, she needs to have named an agent to make decisions on her behalf, following her will and advance directive.

A financial power of attorney is similar, only it covers financial decisions. Her financial POA would take over paying her bills, signing her up for insurance plans, and handling banking transactions like doing her taxes or depositing checks.

The final form is the advance directive. This form directs her doctors and medical POA agent to make her medical decisions, like whether she’d want to be on a feeding tube or ventilator.

Your Mom Won’t Always Be Cooperative

It’s not personal, but your mom will never cooperate with you. The disease can cause severe behavioral issues. Don’t be surprised if your mom argues with you over things like taking a shower or eating the dinner you prepared for her.

You may need to get your mom to her eye exam, but that doesn’t mean she’ll want to go. She may refuse to leave the car or walk into the building. Prepare yourself to become a key negotiator. It’s okay to bribe her if that’s what it takes.

Remember, Your Mom is Used to Being the Parent

You have to remember that your mom always held the parental role. Switching roles at this age is difficult for her. Be patient and try to understand how she’s feeling.

If you start feeling overwhelmed, it’s okay to step out of the room or stand outside to get some fresh air. She’ll forget why she was frustrated, and you have a chance to breathe and calm down.

Self-Care is Important for Your Mental, Emotional, and Physical Health

It’s essential that you take care of yourself. Take a break as often as you need, and let a senior care aide stay with your mom while you’re away. A senior care advisor helps you get started by answering your questions and going over prices.

If you or an aging loved one are considering Senior Care in East Hampton, NY, call the caring staff at Artful Home Care today at 631-685-5001.

Sources:

https://www.aarp.org/content/dam/aarp/ppi/2021/05/caregiving-in-the-united-states-50-plus.doi.10.26419-2Fppi.00103.022.pdf